Monday, May 14, 2012

Mothers Day

Today has been a really hard day...
Before I had Chloe, before Travis, before I got serious about my life... There was always one thing I knew, And that was, that I always wanted to be a mother. I love children, I love them with my whole heart!
My 2 Nieces were born when I was 12 years old, They were so much fun! I don't remember a whole lot from when they were babies, but I do remember when they started walking and talking, I loved playing with them. both of the girls are named after me, There is Megan Sue who obviously has my first name, and Haley Nicole who has my middle name! I love that they both got named after me, it is so speical, I think even when I was still a kid then, I knew that I wanted to be a mommy some day.
I started babysitting when I was 14 for our neighbors. They have 2 beautiful twin boys and another adorable red head son, and they melted my heart when I got to see them and watch them. After a while their very beautiful daughter was born. I enjoyed every minute with them. When their Dad got a job promotion and had to move, I was so heart broken, but Praise the Lord for Facebook! I get to see pictures of them and see how they are growing! 

My other niece was born just a few years ago, I want to say that she was born in 2007 but I don't think that is right. She is kinda named after me to! Her name is Tegan ( like saying Megan but with a T ) I love that little girl so much.... I was in my older teens when she was born. Maybe 16 or 17. I remember when I first held her, I couldn't believe how little she was and just how beautiful. I used to love holding her and just looking her eyes for what seemed like hours.
When my other nieces started kindergarten, I was a senior in high school, and the bus stop was just right down the road from the house. I would get home from school, and Tegan would be waiting for me, standing in front of the gate so she couldn't get in the kitchen, She would see me and get all excited! I would throw my stuff down, and pick her up and love on her and talk to my mom for a few and before I knew it, it was time to get Haley and Megan from they bus stop, I would sometimes take Tegan with me and I loved having Tegan in my arms and Haley on one side and Megan on the other, or on days I didn't bring Tegan with me, I would each girls hand, and I loved it.
When I was about 18-20 Haley became my little Mini me, She wanted to everything I did. It reminded me of how I always wanted to be like my sister and was her mini me, and here is her daughter doing the same to me. It was so wonderful. Haley was my best friend. She was the one I asked on how I looked because if it looked bad, She was going to be honest about it! If I was sad, She was the one I wanted to hug and talk to, to feel better. I never realized just how much I really meant to her until I moved here to Kentucky. 
My move here was.... unplanned. I came here to visit between the days of March 8-16. When I came here, I knew I didn't want to leave, I was so happy, I had the love of my life ( whom on the 8th was my first time meeting in person. We talked on the phone for a few months ) and I had my brother who is mainly part of the reason why I was able to come to know Travis. Me and my brother are close so I knew if I moved here I wouldn't be so far away from my family. Anyways, Haley was heartbroken, I felt the worst. But I knew that she would eventually adjust and that I could still talk to her and be her role model.
I moved here on March 8th I guess you could say technically. We were married on March 17th 2011, and a couple weeks later we drove to Indiana, and I spent all my time with my family and at 1am the next day, we packed up a small carload of my things and we left. It was hard... but I so happy to be in Kentucky. I wish I could move my whole family here! I've been up to Indiana 1 time since.  
Anyways, I'm rambling.
I started volunteer work for Erins House for Grieving children. I worked with children aged 6-9 and that was so wonderful and rewarding. I wish I could have continued doing it, But the unplanned moved here cancelled that. I am thankful that I was able to spend time doing that when I had the opportunity... there was such wonderful people there and I learned a lot...  and I think I grew up some.
I've always wanted to be a mother... on May 11, 2011 me and Travis found out we were pregnant. We only knew because I started feeling a little sick and we took a test a few days before my body told me I was and it was positive.... I was so happy... WE were so happy. I was thrilled to know that we were having a baby so raise and to be parents. after just a few weeks we knew that if we had a girl, her name would be Chloe Lee and if we had a boy his name would be Travis Brady, but we would call him Brady.
Before we found out the sex of the baby, I was convinced I was having a boy because I had a dream about having a baby boy, and my dad only has granddaughters so in a way I wanted a boy for him. My mother and Sister in laws said I was having a girl, and I was thinking secretly " that would be so awesome! "  We found out we were having a girl and I was SO excited! I was going to be a mommy to a little girl! I remember my mom telling me about how she told my dad and all he said was "oh". *smiles & giggles* He really wanted a boy.... but he has a soft spot for his granddaughter. The pregnancy went fine until one night, me and Travis were laying on the bed watching a football game I think. I kept cramping, and it wouldn't go away for over an hour. I had a Dr's appointment the next day but I knew I had to go to the hospital . I was about 25 weeks when that happened. The nurse hooked me up to the monitors and she checked me and told me it was a good thing I had came in because I was already 1cm dilated and was having contractions. I stayed over night at the hospital and Thankfully my Drs office/OBGYN is right next to the hospital, They said I was now on bed rest  and they wheeled me over to my appointment. I remember some of the women looking at me funny. I went in for an ultrasound and they stated looking at Chloe and they didn't really say anything besides to come back on 'Thursday' for another Ultrasound, it was a Monday morning when this happened. I went back for my ultrasound and That iswhen a lot of things started happening....

I'm going to give you all a cliffhanger, Things really start to get intentse after this.

I love being a Mother and The Good Lord can bless us again with another Child, EB free. My husbands cousin had a baby 30 years ago born with EB. Chloe is buried just a few feet away from him... She had another Child, and they don't have EB. The Lord works in ways we may not understand. But I do pray for another child, and for that child to not have EB. Some may not agree, some may think some awful things about us, for me saying that. But I have faith... I've seen the Lord move. Chloe wasn't supposed to live past St. Patrick's day weekend, but she lived a week longer. 

More to come in the next couple days, and my good friend Mollie has been working and being so amazing at getting some memorial T-Shirts ready to sell, Might have them ready to purchase by the end of the week!

Matthew 7:7
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

Matthew 21:21-22
21 Jesus answered them and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, if ye have faith and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree but also if ye shall say into this mountain, be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done  22 and all things whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing ye shall receive

I took 4 test to make sure I was pregnant, this is one of them :)

you can see her little arms and legs! I got some great ultrasound pictures! 

Its a girl!

Her foot!

She started to yawn

one of my favorite ultrasound pictures, Love that little bump nose.

Another one of my favorites. At one ultrasound I got to see her start sucking her thumb, It was amazing!

1 comment:

  1. "I'm going to give you all a cliffhanger, Things really start to get intense after this."
    Please finish the cliff hanger and let us know what they saw on the ultra sound...My heart is with you and Gods arms are always around you my dear...I have a special needs child but he is 37 now....We accept what life brings to us and cherish what we have our life here is very short compared to eternity...